It’s possible that you’ve known for years if not a decade or two who is going to undertake the very important role of your Maid of Honour and now that he’s popped the question, one of the first phone calls you will have made will be to your best friend or “bestie”; she could be your sister, your cousin, your lifelong friend or someone you have met a couple of years ago but whoever she is, you love her, trust her and want her to share in your day as much as possible. The same goes for your Groom although men’s relationships with their friends don’t often include discussing TOWIE or the best shade of lipstick for plumping out your lips… or speculating on when he’s going to finally ask you to marry him. They normally bond over a favourite football team, rugby matches, and a night in the pub or through the gym for example. Whoever it is he has chosen you have to respect his decision! We say this because while many of you won’t have an issue with the best man some of you may be a little skeptical as to whether he is up to the job!
The bottom line is, now you have both selected your Maid of Honour and Best Man, what should you be expecting them to do? – Except for hopefully show up on time! The role of both is varied and can be as involved as much or as little as you want. There is no set job description but as it is our job at Warble Entertainment to make sure that your band, solo artist, magician, circus entertainer or lookalike are all absolutely spot on for your big day – it is their job to make sure that your day also goes off without a hitch. So now you “trust” both the Maid of Honour and Best Man let’s establish what they could be doing for you!
The Maid of Honour
Your Maid of Honour probably knows almost as much as you do about your Groom, after all, as she’s your best friend, you may well have discussed many intricate (and intimate) details. So bear this in mind as she is the number one choice for organising your Hen Night as there could be a downside (more on that later). Not every bride to be wants an evening full of strippers, rude games and copious amounts of drinking, you may prefer something more refined such as a day at a spa followed by a great meal at a fabulous restaurant so if you know in advance the type of event you are looking for – do tell her! Warn her that naked waiters just don’t do it for you. In contrast of course, if you do want something a little risqué then you should let her know too. Do think about whom you want to invite to your Hen Night, an evening with your Mother and Future Mother in Law listening to intimate details about your husband to be can be mortifying rather than hilarious.
Apart from the Hen Night, it is up to the Maid of Honour to be able to offer you plenty of emotional and practical support so choose wisely! Some brides want their Maids of Honour to come with them wedding dress shopping or if not, to certainly have a say in an outfit they will be wearing, especially if they are paying for it. Think about this carefully, it may be a wise idea to let her help with the bridesmaid’s and her own dress after all; you would hate to think that she will be wearing something she absolutely loathes on your day.
She is also the person who is designated to help you with all your pre-wedding tasks, this could be something like helping to book your beauty treatments, advising on make-up and hairstyles (even going with you for trials), writing invitations and even lending an ear to the choice of entertainment.
Your Maid of Honour can also help co-ordinate transport for the guests to and from the wedding and reception; she can help seat people at the ceremony and make sure that there is plenty of reserve seating for the family members. It is her role to distribute and look after bouquets and hold your bouquet while you exchange vows. She should “manage” the bridesmaids too, checking on their hair and makeup progress and making sure their outfits are complete.
Your Maid of Honour can look after the rings (or the Best Man can) during the ceremony and it is up to her to help arrange your train (if you have one). She will also possibly be the person who signs the bridal register if you would like (although some people choose other dear friends or family to do this task). She should also look after any gifts or envelopes that are brought to the function – and make sure they are stored away in a safe place.
Additionally, the Maid of Honour should ensure that guests are looked after during the party (as well as this being the role of the bride and groom) and she should keep you both calm and relaxed (as best she can). One of the most important jobs of all is to have plenty of tissues handy – for everyone!
The Best Man
Contrary to popular belief it is not the Best Man’s role to be the clown, nor is it his job to lead the Groom astray. It is up to him to look after the Groom and make sure he gets to the wedding in one piece and on time! It is definitely up to him to provide an amusing speech in honour of the Groom full of anecdotes but not too rude please! Some speeches can go a little over the top – remember, there are children in the room! Failing that, have a word with the Best Man or if you have to – use bribery! On a serious note, do be prepared for anything, it is often the trend for a Best Man to try and out do the other Best Men speeches he has heard so try not to be too shocked!
The Best Man should do all he can to help the Groom in the lead up to the wedding, there are plenty of responsible duties to take on board, not just arranging the Stag Night. Many Best Men help choose the Groom’s outfit as well as those of the Groomsmen or Ushers and hopefully, your Groom has chosen his Best Man well and he will try and organise everyone on time to fittings. Yes it is definitely his role to organise the Stag, make sure everyone who should be is invited, book the venue and take the share of money from all included. He should also arrange the Stag activities. Brides should let the Groom and his Best Man enjoy themselves but ask them to please play it safe and make sure the Groom does literally come home in one piece (no shaved eyebrows please).
The Best Man is also responsible for organising accommodation for those guests who are traveling especially for the wedding and make sure they are comfortable too. On the day itself, the Best Man should help the Groom get dressed and make sure the Ushers are all wearing the right clothes with the right buttonholes. He should be aware of the timings of the day and ensure everyone is available for photographs when expected to be and the wedding party are where they are supposed to be when they are supposed to be there.
They are equally responsible with the Maid of Honour for looking after the wedding rings and should keep a copy of the marriage license with them. Often, the Best Man is the person who signs the register as a witness for the Groom. They are often expected to give a toast at the reception and they are expected to make sure that everyone is enjoying themselves during the proceedings.
Of course… sometimes it is up to the Best Man with the help of the Ushers to prepare something in the bridal suite so watch out for the Apple Pie bed!
One last piece of advice, it does help if the Best Man and the Maid of Honour like and get on with each other – they will be spending a lot of time together, who knows, you could be attending their wedding next!
Published by Warble Entertainment