The Velvet Penguins

Location London
Starting from £3,600.00
3 reviews
Location London
Starting from £3,600.00
Read 3 reviews
The Velvet Penguins are the musical-comedy duo whose mischievous lyrics 10 Downing Street tried to censor… until their jazzy tunes had the PM dancing!

Watch The Velvet Penguins

Watch The Velvet Penguins

The Velvet Penguins

Number of Reviews and Counting... 3!
Unlikely love-children of the Footlights and college choirs, this classically-trained duo write and perform ‘face-achingly funny' songs, backed by sizzling jazz piano. Troubadours for the Twitter age, they have featured several times on BBC Radio - and were selected for BBC Radio 4 Extra Comedy Club’s Pick of The Year.

From Berkeley Square to Barbados, Piccadilly to Portofino, they are fast becoming the toast of the most marvellous parties around the world.
  • Standard: Vocals x 2, and Piano (ideal for background music or a cabaret set)
  • Trio: Vocals x 2, Piano, Double Bass and Drums (ideal for dancing!)

1st Set (15mins, pre-pudding)
La Donna E Mobile - our millennial-friendly translation of the opera classic
Just One Drink? - a highly-relatable cautionary tale of midweek drinking...
Food, Laborious Food!

2nd Set (15mins, post-pudding)
Salisbury - a Russian folk-song about a certain ‘wonderful town’
Air: on a G-String - our setting to words of J.S. Bach’s masterpiece
Pourquoi le Brexît? - Jean-Claude Juncker & Michel Barnier duet to ‘My Way' 

, Birthday Party, Hampshire

Thank you for Saturday... Everyone thought you were fabulous!

, Private Party, London

The Velvet Penguins were great fun - very talented and extremely nice. They were a great addition to our party.

, Birthday Party, Cambridgeshire

The Velvet Penguins are superb musicians and entertaining performers. Their voices blend seamlessly together, enabling them to cover any track with ease. Their natural rapport, both with each other and their audience, is hugely endearing. Their real talent lies in their gently satirical re-writing of lyrics to well-known songs. These pieces showcase their style – a harmonious blend of intelligent wit and innate musicality, performed with elegance and irreverence. This combination makes them a fantastic addition to any party. They are talented, charming and reliable – I would highly recommend them.

  • 10 Downing St
  • Radio 4 Extra Comedy Club
  • 5 Hertford St
  • Highclere Castle

and more...

Do you offer extras such as DJ service, extra musicians etc.?
As standard we offer a keyboardist. For an additional £750 we offer a double bassist and drummer for our 'trio' option.

Do you have your own PA and sound equipment?
From experience, it works best if you arrange for a sound technician to provide a piano/keyboard, 2 microphones, and a ‘PA’ / amplification system, and to control the levels during the performance. For smaller venues/audiences, amplification might not be necessary- this can be discussed; however, we can provide at an additional cost if necessary.

  • 2 x 15 / 20min sets of ’supremely entertaining' songs.

Can do a sit-down show of an hour, but this is not background music.

Please Note: The fees indicated below are approximate and based on a central location for each county. They are intended to provide a rough guide only and exact quotes can only be given once the date and exact location of your event have been provided.


Aberdeen £3,600.00 Inverness £3,600.00 Perth £3,600.00 Sutherland £3,600.00 Ayrshire £3,600.00 Fife £3,600.00 Stirlingshire £3,600.00 West Lothian £3,600.00 Dumfries-shire £3,600.00 East Lothian £3,600.00 Lanarkshire £3,600.00 Midlothian £3,600.00 Glasgow £3,600.00 Edinburgh £3,600.00 Dundee £3,600.00

Foreign Locations

Europe £4,200.00 Rest of the world £4,800.00

North East

Durham £3,600.00 Northumberland £3,600.00 North Yorkshire £3,600.00 South Yorkshire £3,600.00 Tyne and Wear £3,600.00 West Yorkshire £3,600.00 Yorkshire £3,600.00 East Yorkshire £3,600.00 Leeds £3,600.00

North West

Cheshire £3,600.00 Cumbria £3,600.00 Manchester £3,600.00 Lancashire £3,600.00 Merseyside £3,600.00 Liverpool £3,600.00

East Midlands

Derbyshire £3,600.00 Leicestershire £3,600.00 Lincolnshire £3,600.00 Northamptonshire £3,600.00 Nottinghamshire £3,600.00 Rutland £3,600.00


Cambridgeshire £3,600.00 Norfolk £3,600.00 Suffolk £3,600.00 Norwich £3,600.00


Anglesey £3,600.00 Caernarvonshire £3,600.00 Denbigh £3,600.00 Flint £3,600.00 Cardigan £3,600.00 Brecon £3,600.00 Carmarthen £3,600.00 Glamorgan £3,600.00 Monmouth £3,600.00 Pembroke £3,600.00 Wrexham £3,600.00 Cardiff £3,600.00

West Midlands

Gloucestershire £3,600.00 Herefordshire £3,600.00 Shropshire £3,600.00 Staffordshire £3,600.00 Warwickshire £3,600.00 Worcestershire £3,600.00 Birmingham £3,600.00

South East

Bedfordshire £3,600.00 Berkshire £3,600.00 Buckinghamshire £3,600.00 East Sussex £3,600.00 Essex £3,600.00 Hampshire £3,600.00 Hertfordshire £3,600.00 Isle of Wight £3,600.00 Kent £3,600.00 Oxfordshire £3,600.00 Surrey £3,600.00 Sussex £3,600.00 West Sussex £3,600.00 London £3,600.00 Middlesex £3,600.00

South West

Cornwall £3,600.00 Devon £3,600.00 Dorset £3,600.00 Somerset £3,600.00 Wiltshire £3,600.00 Bath £3,600.00 Bristol £3,600.00
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